Tags: grey ayres

Dakota - Sunlight

...Uncomfortable Post Alert!

So, I was gonna write about the con that I went to back in April, but it's 1am, my stomach hurts, and I need to be up in four hours to go to the laundromat.  So instead I will discuss what occurred at said laundromat two weeks ago on one very annoyingly hot Saturday morning, so that I can get it out of my head and quit worrying like a freak.

Okay, yeah.  So, I go do the laundry with my Mom every week, and we always go elsewhere to do it, because if we use the laundry area provided in our apartment building our clothes get infested with weird little bugs - very disgusting.  And it so goes against the concept of doing laundry, coming home with dirty clothes.  So we've been going to this laundromat for a while now, although it's only been... I'd say about two or three months Mom and I have been going alone, without her bf K, who works Saturdays now.  Used to be he and Mom went at night, but Mom went (by herself!  Crazy woman) one Saturday morning and was thrilled to discover it's normally empty when you go so early.  So she started going in the early, early am, and I started going with her.

At this point, I must say a huge thank you to Starbucks, without whose frappuccinos I could not be human on said mornings.  ^_^

Anyway, we always go now, and while I don't love it, it's just another one of those things you have to do, like working and breathing and, if you're me, writing.  But that Saturday...  Okay, we were there, the clothes were in the dryer, and by now, a few people have shown up and that's pretty normal.  One guy and a girl, and another guy, the one who's always there after a bit, who vaguely annoyed me once long ago by stealing my seat when I got up to move the clothes from the washer to the dryer, and who stares at people so much and acts in such a way I honestly think he's mentally disabled.  This doesn't bother me - my Aunt is schizophrenic, much of her friends are the same, and being around people with mental handicaps is something I used to do pretty regularly; I worked with them in school, and I sometimes hung with my Aunt at the mental health clinic when she had to go.  The only reason I'm mentioning any of this is that I don't want anyone to think what I say about this guy later is influenced by some sort of 'omg he's different!' reaction, because it isn't.

So anyway, us and those three people are the only ones there.  Then Mom tells me, as we're sitting in the car being our antisocial selves, that she has to go to the bathroom.  So do I, but the bathroom is usually out of toilet paper, and though I've been in it before I don't really like the place.  But Mom risks it, and after taking forever in there comes back to tell me it's clean and well-stocked this time.  We are, by now, standing around outside, and this laundromat opens up on the parking lot, so we're not that far from the people sitting inside the laundry area.  I decide to risk it, and I tell Mom where I'm going; in fact, I have to tell her twice, because, God bless her, she's sometimes utterly deaf.

I see someone, a guy, though I don't notice which one, get up right after I say I'm going to the bathroom.  This alarms me a little, as I know there's a huge-*ss f*cking window right above the toilet; anyone who cared to could look right inside.  So I get in there, hurry as fast as I can; and then, when I've straightened my clothes and am staring right out the window - I can see my Mom in the parking lot, far off, not looking towards me - the guy I think is mentally disturbed walks by.  And stares in the window.  Looks right into my eyes.

I admit, I didn't want to think he did it on purpose, but he knows the place so well, and he had to know I was in there - I said where I was going in front of everyone, twice, and the second time pretty loudly, so Mom could hear me.  And it wasn't just a quick glance in, either; he was staring.  I got out of there so bloody fast.

For the record, I am not a pretty girl.  Not in the tall, thin, perfect kind of way.  Things like that are not common occurrences for me.  Sure, I get guys staring at my chest sometimes, particularly when I'm wearing something low-cut (as I...  *ahem* ... like to ^_~ ), but that's always a little amusing to me.  It's so obvious.  So juvenile.  It doesn't really bother me that much.

But this...  that's a whole new kind of naked, and a whole new kind of perversion for me.  I mean, okay, I've encountered perverts before - like when I was younger, and we had the internet for all of a few months, and I was trying to find people to be part of a rock band with me online; my Hanson-loving nickname was luvHITZ, and one of the guys who wrote to me made slight sexual innuendo and called me luvTITZ; or when that guy followed me around the mall a couple of Christmas' ago, after being all nice to me at the counter in Sam Goody.  But this...  It bugged me.  Still does, in fact.

And last week, the guy showed up again; I swear, he's always there after a while.  Mom and I were sitting in the parking lot across from the laundromat, and he walks in front of us, lifting his shirt and generally making his presence known.  Even were he not an obvious pervert, he's in his thirties, hefty and hairy; not the kind of body that makes me go nuts, so I don't know why he's so consumed with showing it to me or anyone else.  And I'm only ranting about that because he is an obvious pervert, or else I wouldn't give a d*mn what he looked like.

We went into the laundromat after that, and didn't leave it and the safety zone of the other people who'd shown up by then until the clothes were done (well, mostly done) and we could go.  We're not stupid.

And he didn't get any closer that day, just sat on a bench on the other side of the lot with some old man.  Thank God.

Oh, and as we were leaving the day he peeked in on me, he kept staring, and got within two or three feet of my mother as we were getting in our car.  I stared at him the whole time, trying not to freak the f*ck out because if he touches her I don't know what the hell we'll do.  He's bigger and stronger, and I swear to God I have never felt more female in my life.

I don't mean female as in womanly, sexy, and strong, either.  I mean female as in powerless, helpless, and at the mercy of the 'man' and whatever he wants to do to her.

Y'know, I don't care if he didn't really mean it, or he is unstable; I hate him for making me feel that way.

...We told Mom she's not allowed to go by herself anymore.  And me, I'm just... tired of perverts.  I would love to meet a man who was attracted to me but could, y'know, control himself and not freak me out with his perversions.  Be a pervert once we're together; I swear to God, I won't care then.  Ask any of my lovely, lovingly perverted friends.  ;)

...*sigh*  So, anyway, yeah; that's been my life of late.  And I go again in... three hours.  Great-f*ckin'-joy, that.

...Hopefully, he just never figures out how early we show up; the guy who usually opens the place always disappears to God-knows-where after he does it, and we're usually alone.  And that just... I don't want to be alone with that man.

Even with Mom there.  Especially with Mom there; I can't protect her.

Although, as I told K once, a guy ever attacks me like that, I do have a plan.  (Honestly, I think every woman probably should, regardless of how strong or pretty she is or, in my case, isn't.)  Grab and twist, man.  Grab and f*cking twist.  And then run.

K was all like, 'But how will you get that close?'  And as I told him, if the guy's attacking me like that, getting that close to his dick won't be a problem.

I phrased it a little differently (a tad cleaner), but still, the point was made.  And I still believe it, too.  I just don't want to ever have to use my plan.  And honestly, I don't think I will - I think I'm just paranoid, and nervous, because I am me and I get paranoid, and nervous - but... one never knows.

...And it's now after 2am and I am so over talking about this.  Next time, happy happy con talk, hopefully.  After all, it was even better than the first year, because I got to meet Greg Ayres.  *bounces*  Goku, man.  GOKU.  And he signed my artbook and everything.  ^____^  But I refuse to soil his name or my memories of the con by discussing it any further in this post, so good day to all of you, my wonderful friends!  ^_^

And remember, stay out of bathrooms!  *lol*  ^_~  Heh.